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Reviewed by Joseph, 2006-09-07
Categories: Boobs, Pornstar, Hardcore, Mega-Sites, Movies, Videos
Visit Heavenly Knockers
| Review summary: Heavenly Knockers isn't as focused on big breasts as the name might imply. All movies start with some breast play though and then end in straight hardcore sex. Part of the BrainPass site network. Decent but not impressive video quality. |
What is heaven like? Is it filled with puffy white clouds, halos and harps? Is it “a place where nothing happens” like the Talking Heads once suggested? Or is it “a place where you are happy” as television “journalist” Barbara Walters reportedly believes? I have no idea, but I’d like to think that Babs is right. Heaven should be a place where you are happy, thus it must be filled with gorgeous angels with enormous tits. And if that’s the case, then Heavenly Knockers is a little slice of heaven right here on earth.
Heavenly Knockers keeps it real—real simple. You won’t find any message boards, jokes or other mindless filler on this site, just twenty-five videos starring women with humongous hooters. Oh, sure, there’s also a number of poor low resolution screen caps from the videos (which you can download separately or in a convenient ZIP file), but you won’t want to bother with ‘em cos they look awful, as screen caps are wont to look. This site is extremely easy to navigate; if you have trouble finding your way around Heavenly Knockers, then you probably voted for George W. Bush in the last presidential election... you moron.
All the videos are roughly the same, so those looking for variety should look elsewhere. Each video begins with a close-up of the model and her tits; the model is shown showering, sunbathing, stripping and/or simply posing for the camera. Her boobs are later oiled up, soaped and massaged by an anonymous male. Sometimes the model’s boobs are licked... by the model herself. I’ll confess that I found these portions of the videos a bit creepy. I mean, who wants to watch some guy slather baby oil on a woman’s tits anyway?! And what kind of woman would want you to soap up her tits in real life? So many questions, so few answers.
Guess what happens next? Yup, you guessed it: fucking. All kinds of fucking, in fact: anal sex, tit-fucking (natch!), threesomes, lesbianism, etc. Not surprisingly, the camera’s eye focuses on the models’ sizable chests, thus members get ample opportunity to watch these ample bosoms shake, shimmer, bounce up and down, swing from side-to-side and dangle to and fro. You’ll find yourself hypnotized by these quivering mounds of female flesh. It’s a beautiful thing. My only beef with the videos is that there wasn’t nearly enough character development in ‘em for my tastes. (Yes, we saw Tiana get tit-fucked, but we never learned why she wanted to be tit-fucked in the first place.)
The quality of the videos is excellent and downloading in both MPEG and WMV formats is available. The movies are cut up into numerous five-minute segments, which last a total of fifteen to twenty-five minutes a piece. The videos come in two speeds: low and high. How ‘bout that! This site, with its segmented videos and choice of download speeds, is friendly to folks still living in the twentieth century who use dial-up to go online.
I have no idea how often this site gets updated, but members of Heavenly Knockers also get access to a constantly growing network that currently has over thirty sites on its roster, including I Want Latina, Cherry Potter, Real Squirt, Girly Gang Bang and I Love It Black. You think you can handle all that hot action, pussy? I didn’t think so. You disgust me.
You like big tits? You like watching women with big tits fuck strangers for money? If you answered yes to the previous two questions, then you’ll probably enjoy Heavenly Knockers. I could write a bunch of meaningless words to further convince you to join this site, but why bother?
$29.95/30 days (recurring)
$59.95/90 days (recurring)
All transactions handled securely and discretely by PAYCOM.NET and CCBILL.
Preview gallery: Check out the free preview pictures provided by Heavenly Knockers
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